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The KEY Questions: Are you open to persuasion?

28 May 17

   “Make yourself comfortable. You’re feeling drowsy. That’s right. You’re feeling so tired now that you can’t keep your eyelids open, no matter how hard you try. As you listen to my words, slowly let them close and allow yourself to drift down into a deep sleep…”   zzzzzzzzzzzz  “In a moment I will count down from ‘ten’ to ‘one’. As I do you will slowly come out of your trance feeling happy and relaxed, until I reach ‘one’, at which point you will get up, pick up your phone and instruct your bank to transfer everything in your account across to mine.”

There’s a joke that invariably gets told at some point during the day when I’m doing a hypnotherapy training session. Someone will say, to the amusement of the other students, (and me, though I’ve heard it many times), “How do I know I’ve learned anything? Maybe you just hypnotized me into thinking that I have!” Everyone laughs. No one believes for a second that it could be true, because from the very start of the course any false beliefs they may have harbored about hypnosis – such as the idea that people can be made to do things against their will as a result of being ‘put under’ – have been dispelled. (This is not to say that so-called ‘post-hypnotic suggestion’ is a myth, only that the subject must be willing and happy to carry out those instructions, when fully conscious, that didn’t feel ‘wrong’ to their previously unconscious minds). But the fact that we always laugh at the joke gives a clue to the very real anxiety that we all experience when being ‘sold’ something, be it a second-hand car or a hypnotherapy course, and it begs the question, how can we trust that we are not being taken for a ride?

We can’t entirely. Here’s another question: is it right or ethical to use NLP techniques to persuade people to buy into an NLP program or course? Even something as basic as getting into rapport with a potential customer by mirroring their body language or playing to their speech patterns might be interpreted as taking unfair advantage of that person, acting in some way dishonestly to achieve the desired result: a sale. In the case of NLP, you can of course argue that what worked on your client will surely work the same on his or her clients in turn, but all of this is really missing the point. The point is it all depends on what you’re selling.

It’s worth repeating: selling is nothing more than a transfer of enthusiasm. If you don’t believe in your product but go ahead and sell it anyway, using all the tricks in the book, you may well succeed, but the customer will eventually realise that they have been misled, and they won’t return. On the other hand, if you know for certain that your client will benefit hugely from your product – because you yourself have benefited from it – it is something like a duty to persuade them to buy, and in this case it is only natural that you will try your hardest to get past their reservations and prejudices to get them to part with their money, money that you know full well will save them money in the long run. You establish trust with your clients when, and only when, they see the value of what you are offering. And then, trust me, they will come back.

The proof of the pudding, as they say, is in the eating. It is relatively easy to persuade people that they have power, that they are awesome, that they can achieve anything. The reason is of course because it’s true: we humans are powerful, far more powerful than most of us realise. We are also infinitely suggestible. A charismatic ‘leader’ trained in human psychology can get almost any audience up on their feet, punching the air, pumped up to the point of madness with the desire to ‘learn the secret’. At this point money will change hands very quickly. But later, when that enthusiasm inevitably fades, what is left? The product, and it will either live up to the hype or it won’t.

Here’s my answer to the whole question of ethics and selling my courses. We already know what it is we need to learn before we learn it. We go on instinct. Our unconscious, otherwise known as ‘Mind’, is what guided us to the course in the first place, and it’s our unconscious, if we are able to tune into it, that tells us what is false and what is true. Mind never lies.

Trust me!

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  • Having attended David's course and then had some one to one sessions with him my approach to my life has changed dramatically and improved. David has a very gentle and empathic way about him, yet managed to challenge my habitual way of being and thinking. As a result of our time together I now practice his "way of being" and I truly find that I am getting far better results in all of the relationships that I encounter. My inner chatter is under control, most of the time, and I am learning to pause and push away harmful thinking . It's surprising how habitual thinking can do so much damage and how, once you really focus on what comes into your mind you start to realise that you can be bigger than your random thoughts. So David thank you for putting me on a better pathway. Looking forward to sharing another journey with the Auspicium family!
    Rowena Wild

  • The course I attended with David Key was marvellous, every moment being filled with joy and laughter. David has a unique talent to teach, unlocking the full potential of every person he encounters. His course opened up an infinite number of ways for me to get the life I want, right now, today, and in the future. It made me realise that thought is fluid and that I can mould it the way I want to suit my day. I would highly recommend this course to anyone in search of a new professional career or for those who simply want a happier life. Thank You!
    Lucia Pohrebnyak

  • It took me about 5 years of 'dithering' before committing, and in that time I attended several introductory days from various training providers. David's accessible style and the unforced flow of the day is what persuaded me to choose his company. David provides a training model that helps you become your best self - as a student, as a practitioner, as a person. By 'best', I mean more open, less fearful, more confident, less judgemental - whether you attend the course to make a change personally or professionally, to build on existing success, or with no idea where it might go, simply because you are interested (that was me!) you will be impressed at what you are able to achieve with David's expert guidance showing you how to use your curiosity as a pathway to growth. In the first week following the course, I dealt with several potentially difficult situations both at work and home, coming from a changed perspective - resulting in no conflict, calmer colleagues, less stressed family. And this without actively using any techniques; the biggest change has been inside my own headspace. I can't wait to do the next course. Now that I know, unequivocally, the benefits to be had, I wish I had come down off the fence years ago! Added bonus, a bunch of fabulous new friends. And a final thought about cost; some of you reading this will be struggling to justify spending a chunk of hard earned money "just" for yourself. Well, I will be using these tools every day for the rest of my life - pennies a day investment! I am SO worth it. And so are you!
    Sue Bee

  • I first met David at an evening business club a couple of years ago. During his presentation something “clicked” with me and I felt compelled to further my understanding of NLP. I attended the Auspicium free trial day. My earlier feelings were confirmed. This guy knows what he’s talking about and has a passion for helping people. I duly signed up for the NLP and Hypnotherapy practitioner course. What a week. All in the class left in such high spirits with a very different outlook on life. Following on I have attended the NLP and Hypnotherapy Master Practitioner course. Again excellent. There was something about the Hypnotherapy element of the course that I loved so on to the Hypnotherapy Trainers Training (another absolutely brilliant week). All the courses that I have attended have been very well organised, have a great team of trainers and support volunteers. The documentation is well put together and the exercises are all structured to push yourself to show you have a grasp of the given subject. I now have a fantastic group of new friends who I have a deep link with. We still meet up when we can to catch up on what we are all doing. As of March this year I have been participating in the Auspicium Freedom Project. This is a yearlong “conversation” about the 3 Principles – Mind, Thought and Consciousness. It took me a while to “get” it but now just by “doing nothing” I find myself doing more with better results and no stress. There are no models or techniques to learn. We all have the Principles inside us. We just need to be woken up to how to use them. It’s a great journey that will take the rest of my life. David is a superb trainer and fully deserves all the praise he receives.
    Phillip Warris

  • Before going on David’s Practitioner course, I thought I knew what I wanted, where I was headed and how I was going to get it. All I wanted an additional skill to add to my portfolio. I thought my life was in reasonably good order, nothing that needed fixing. I can sum up my experience of working with David in two words: life-changing. Instead of just learning a new skill, David encouraged us to apply his teaching, our learning, to ourselves. In a very safe environment, I gradually dropped the barriers I had painstakingly built up over a long time. This change happened very quickly and I continued growing as a person, studying 2 more courses with David and joining him on the Freedom project. Why David? He is disarmingly honest, genuine and engaging. He has a very broad knowledge of human behaviour and passes his knowledge on with grace. As a result of working with David, I have changed, and my life has changed. In myself I am very happy and contented person. My marriage is better and stronger. My business plans have taken a different route - one that is exciting and feels very right for me.
    Valerie